Article Sharing: Forgiveness is a Prerequisite for Genuine Happiness

Resentment is more difficult to forget than gratitude, and Buddhism is about turning resentment into gratitude - forgive the unforgivable and love the unlovable.

There was once a master named Pan Gui, who preached Buddhism and quoted Wonderful Lotus Sutra: "With rainfall, the ground is moisturized." However it depends very much on whether the roots of the trees and grass on earth are ready to accept it.Apart from his disciples, the Zen-Seven retreat was also attended by outsiders, who learnt diligently in the hope of obtaining enlightenment from the retreat.

In the Zen-Seven retreat, one of Master Pan Gui's disciples was caught stealing. All the other disciples refused to forgive the thief as they feared that the outsiders would get the wrong impression about them. It was suggested that the thief be expelled immediately, but Master took no immediate action after acknowledging the incident, and the guilty disciple was left unpunished.

At another event, the same disciple was caught stealing again. His fellow disciples were furious and protested, together with support from the outsiders, hoping that Master would expel the culprit. But again no action was taken by the Master after he received the letter of protest. After some time, the same disciple continued on his stealing rampage. This was intolerable to the other disciples, and as a final remonstration, they told the Master that if this disciple was not expelled, they would have to leave.

Those unforgiven are sad

Master Pan Gui said quietly and calmly to his disciples: "After listening to my preaching on acceptance of the good and purging of the bad, I believed that no matter where you are you can practise Buddhism at ease. As for the person who committed the offence more than once, this is because he made such mistakes unknowingly out of bad habits. If I do not accept him, who will? Since you cannot forgive his wrong-doing, you can leave and practise Buddhism anywhere, but I want to teach him to be good." The disciple with the stealing habit then began to wipe his tears and clear his larcenous thought, after which he genuinely concentrated on pure self-cultivation and passed on the teaching of Master Pan Gui.

Most people only know how to protect themselves, without knowing how to love others. I always said that we should forgive the unforgivable and love the unlovable. Those who are unloved are really pitiable, and those unforgiven are very sad. If we let our mind lose from its intrinsic character and are unable to forgive and love with mercy, then this is also a debauchery act!

Resentment is hard to forget

There are many things in life we never forget, because of our obsession to love or not. A heart with preference will lead us to pursue continuously. This is the obsession of desire. On the same note for hatred, it is difficult to forget about the things, people and matters we hate.
Resentment is harder to forget than gratitude. In interaction with people, there will be conflicts of character. We can work with people we can see eye-to-eye with; but there are also those who we cannot agree with. For the latter, even their good words become abusive and we are anxious to leave them quickly. This is obsessional psychology.

To forgive others is to bring goodwill to oneself

There was a child who wrote an article entitled, "A good saying from my teacher". He told of how his perception about forgiveness changed after his teacher taught him and asked that he copy down a good saying. One day, upon his return from school, he found that his room was messed up by his four-year-old sister. He went into a rage, tightening his fists, and thought of punishing her. But he suddenly thought of the saying: "To forgive others is to be good to oneself", and slowly loosened his fists. He was pleased to learn about forgiveness. His sister gradually loves him more, which goes to prove that: "To forgive others is to be good to oneself."
When he saw all things scattered, his consciousness told him: "How can this be? How can you damage my hard work and scatter them everywhere?" It is the knowledge that spontaneously differentiates, thus creating anger as a result. At this juncture, his consciousness prompted him: "You must be angry; you must teach her a lesson!" Fortunately, wisdom intervened and awakened him to suppress his impulsive action.

To forgive is a virtue, to forgive oneself is decadence. However, we often find a lot of excuses to forgive ourselves, but on others we apply strict rules.

"Only with wisdom can human beings live in harmony and find genuine happiness. This is the reason we learn Buddhism. Through Buddhism, we learn how to resolve and translate resentment and hatred into gratitude and appreciation."

http://www.tzuchimalacca.com/tc_world/tcworld90/e1-1.htm